Living in Nigeria is not for the weak. Every day, we wake up, face challenges that deserve a full documentary, and still move on like it’s normal. If you’ve survived these struggles, congratulations—you’re a certified Nigerian!
1. NEPA Will Always Disgrace You
Electricity in Nigeria has one mission: to humble you.
- Just started watching your favorite movie? Light off!
- About to iron your clothes? No light!
- NEPA takes light after you just bought suya and stored it in the fridge? Rest in peace, suya.
Yet, somehow, your bill remains high. But how? Who used the light??
2. The Traffic Will Frustrate Your Life
In Lagos especially, traffic is a full-time job.
- A 10-minute journey can turn into 3 hours of suffering.
- You left your house by 6 AM, but somehow, you’re still late.
- You try to use Google Maps, and it tells you: “Find another country.”
Some people spend so much time in traffic, their car seats have collected their body print.
3. The Price of Everything Changes Overnight
- You buy rice today for ₦5,000.
- Tomorrow, you go back to the market—it’s now ₦7,500.
- You ask the seller why, and she replies, “Dollar don go up.”
Wait o, when did we start buying rice in dollars???
4. Customer Service? LOL, Good Luck!
In many places, customer service is just vibes and insults.
- You enter a store, and instead of a welcome, you hear: “Yes, what do you want??”
- You complain about bad food, and the waiter looks at you like you’re disturbing world peace.
- You call customer care, and they say, “Sorry, there’s nothing we can do.”
Oga, so why do you have a customer care line???
5. Nigerian Parents Believe “Sleep” Is a Crime
- If you wake up at 7 AM, they’ll say: “You’re still sleeping?? See your mate!”
- If you take an afternoon nap, they’ll say: “Are you the only one tired in this house?”
- But let them sleep for 2 minutes… nobody should disturb them!
Ah ah, so my own sleep is illegal???
6. Banks Will Show You Pepper
You need to withdraw money? Good luck!
- ATM says “Temporarily unable to dispense cash.”
- You try mobile transfer, and it says “Transaction failed.”
- You enter the bank, and they tell you “Come back next week.”
Oga, am I here to open a branch???
7. You Must Know How to Haggle in the Market
- Seller: “Madam, this shoe is ₦15,000.”
- You: “I’ll pay ₦3,000.”
- Seller: “Ah! You want to ruin my business!”
- After 30 minutes of back and forth, you buy it for ₦4,500.
If you don’t know how to price, just accept that you will suffer.
Living in Nigeria is a daily adventure. We cry, we laugh, but we keep pushing.
